This podcast was very difficult for me to listen to.
I had to stop it, come back to it over several days. Listening to it makes my different dissociative parts explode internally!
The intervention of Doctor Muriel Salmona is extremely violent for me!
In fact when I listen to it I bugger ....
I'm not sure we're really hearing everything Doctor Muriel Salmona says. When I listen to it, I switch a lot so I'm not sure I hear all of Dr. Salmona's words and phrases.
The fact that she gives scientific explanations on why the aggressors attack and that she says that the phenomena of dissociation are identical ca makes us bugger!
It makes you angry.
We can't stand it, it's unthinkable to hear that abused children can reproduce knowing, having experienced what it does!
And that the psychobiological mechanisms explained are the same, it seems unfair to us! Understanding in a scientific way what we were going through saved us, legitimacy. That this victory, this healing is associated with the aggressors is as if it all of a sudden dirty.
And to hear that the aggressors have the traumatic memory of the victim within them is as if a part of us is soiled. He took something from us without our consent again.
We feel dirty, discredited by what she says. And that casts doubt on the victims who according to her can also become aggressors ...
It makes us angry !!!
For a while now, I have been hearing and reading associations or articles that say that many aggressors were themselves attacked in their childhood, but I have parts that block research. I wish I could find scientific studies that have studied this and see if what these associations say is true or not ... But I am prevented from doing so. Every time I hear or read this, inside I explode !!!
This podcast there, I did not want to publish it. Inside I just want to scream and hit. I feel soiled by what is said there, I find it unfair.
Once again, the rapists turn the situation to their advantage. Once again, they use our lived suffering, what we are experiencing, we victims, to divert our credibility to their advantage. Once again they mess us up, they silence us, and society associates us with these monsters. Once again the professionals find excuses for them and plan to doubt us, the victims ...
This podcast makes me want to throw up, scream, cry, bring despair ...
This podcast series was SO good! And it ends in an abject way.
I am extremely disappointed!